The Real Reagan
Think you know what made him tick? His letters may surprise you

Lonely Actor, Chilly Scene
A window into Reagan's movie career
His Start in Radio
Reagan's look back at overcoming obstacles
Finding Love after a Loss
Advice on life, love and sex
Liberal Voter to Anticommunist
A letter to Hugh Hefner
Dirty Words Tell the Truth
On the movie Patton
Against Big Government
Reagan to Richard Nixon
Appeal to Russia
Letter to Leonid Breshnev
On Star Wars
The Strategic Defense Initiative
On Honesty
Advice to a Daughter
On A Happy Marriage
To his son Michael
On Hard Work
Making the Grade
On A Messy Room
Advice to a 7th grader
A Fading Voice
Birthday wishes to George Bush, Sr.


Can He Recover?
Hugh Sidey on whether or not Reagan can cope with his job
[3/9/1987]
Ronald Reagan
Memoirs: "An American Life"
[11/5/1990]
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Michael Reagan, son of Ronald Reagan, with his first wife Pamm Putnam in 1971


On How To Stay Happily Married
Reagan wrote to his son Michael, then 26, just before Michael's wedding on June 13, 1971. The marriage lasted a year and then dissolved. Michael married again in 1975.

Dear Mike:

. . . You've heard all the jokes that have been rousted around by all the "unhappy marrieds" and cynics. Now, in case no one has suggested it, there is another viewpoint. You have entered into the most meaningful relationship there is in all human life. It can be whatever you decide to make it.

Some men feel their masculinity can only be proven if they play out in their own life all the locker-room stories, smugly confident that what a wife doesn't know won't hurt her. The truth is, somehow, way down inside, without her ever finding lipstick on the collar or catching a man in the flimsy excuse of where he was till three a.m., a wife does know, and with that knowing, some of the magic of this relationship disappears. There are more men griping about marriage who kicked the whole thing away themselves than there can ever be wives deserving of blame. There is an old law of physics that you can only get out of a thing as much as you put in it . . . Let me tell you how really great is the challenge of proving your masculinity and charm with one woman for the rest of your life . . . It does take quite a man to remain attractive and to be loved by a woman who has heard him snore, seen him unshaven, tended him while he was sick and washed his dirty underwear. Do that and keep her still feeling a warm glow and you will know some very beautiful music. If you truly love a girl, you shouldn't ever want her to feel, when she sees you greet a secretary or a girl you both know, that humiliation of wondering if she was someone who caused you to be late coming home . . .

Mike, you know better than many what an unhappy home is and what it can do to others. Now you have a chance to make it come out the way it should. There is no greater happiness for a man than approaching a door at the end of a day knowing someone on the other side of that door is waiting for the sound of his footsteps.

      Love,
      Dad

P.S. You'll never get in trouble if you say "I love you" at least once a day.

  NEXT LETTER: On Hard Work



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FROM THE SEPTEMBER 29, 2003 ISSUE OF TIME MAGAZINE; POSTED SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 21, 2003

Excerpts from REAGAN, A LIFE IN LETTERS, edited by Kiron K. Skinner, Annelise Anderson and Martin Anderson.
Copyright 2003 by The Ronald Reagan Presidential Foundation.
To be published by The Free Press, a division of Simon & Schuster

Copyright © 2003 Time Inc. All rights reserved.
Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.

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