LIVING DIGITAL

Pages 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

How To Do It

Q & A

Q. My name is Bobby, and I'm 15 and live in Omaha. I have a breakthrough biomedical product and need some help to spread the word. I call it Sphum!, which is a canned lunch meat in two flavors, salt cured and honey glazed. Here's how my invention happened. My dad is a medical technician who works with a Dermalcan, which helps grow fresh new tissue so burn victims lead happier, healthier lives. Two months ago, the hospital bought a new Dermalcan, and my Dad brought the old model home. It still works great; all I did was tweak the tissue output for texture and taste. All my friends love Sphum!, so I want to start selling it. What's the best way to build my marketing base online?

A. Bobby, we applaud your enterprising spirit. You sound like a unique and creative young man. It's hard to believe, though, that the output from a hospital tissue regenerator is going to have much appeal on the dining table.

Q. My real name is Linda, but you can call me Wonderwig. Bobby is one of my best friends at school. I love Sphum!, and I believe that there are lots of kids out there who would love it too. Sphum! tastes great — lots better than tofu or falafel. I don't see anything wrong with eating stuff out of a Dermalcan. Dermalcans come straight from a hospital, so they're super-clean and hygienic. P.S. — My mom loves Sphum! too.

A. Wonderwig, your enthusiastic endorsement does soften our response to Sphum!, but there are two significant problems you should consider.

First, Dermalcans are designed for the rapid growth of skin grafts, using the DNA of a quick-healing donor. The donor retains certain patents as well as trademark rights to the derivative dna of the tissue. Securing those rights could be difficult.

Second, a skillfully handled Dermalcan may indeed be very hygienic, but let's not mince words here: the device grows artificial human flesh. Transplantation is already somewhat risky. Eating the stuff brings with it the danger of genetic contamination and/or prion poisoning. You are facing a cultural stigma that is thousands of years old. That will be extremely difficult to overcome, especially in fastidious countries like Britain.

Q. I am Mr. Qiang from Beijing. I am a tissue donor for this year's run of Dermalcan in Omaha, and I see no problem with Bobby's wonderful idea and tasty product. I give him free license to use my genetic code for Sphum! All best to you and your fine magazine, which I read often!

A. As your letter indicates, Mr. Qiang, there seems to be quite a diversity of opinion on the viability of Sphum! as a product. Will it be the pork rind of the 21st century? Or has the ubiquity and sophistication of biotechnology permanently eroded the fundamental human values of our youth? It's time to expand the debate. Readers, give us your views and feedback on our website.

Q. I just moved in with my boyfriend, and everything he owns has a Ubicomp radio-frequency computer ID tag implanted in it. The tags are cataloged on his hard disk so he can locate any of his possessions at any time, which is great if you're at the computer, but in reality everything is a total mess! He says his "virtual order" is "better and more efficient" than my old-fashioned "actual order," but I'm going crazy. His shoes are in the pantry, his forks are in his toolbox, his plates and bowls are scattered all over the house. He always knows exactly where everything is, but I'm going out of my mind. Help me!

A. If your live-in boyfriend isn't giving you the password to his Ubicomp, then he's not really letting you into his life. But that's a reflection of him, not the wonders of virtual order. With those Ubicomp (by the way, it's short for " ubiquitous computation") tags, you can reorganize your whole household on the fly. Things You Love can go into your favorite parts of the house, while Things You Hate are stuck in dank, grimy corners. If your boyfriend gives you any grief, just split the house into separate areas of Gal Things and Guy Things, so you'll never have to look at his shoe liners or underarm deodorant again. Once you're digitally empowered with Ubicomp, you become an instant goddess. Domestic bliss is just a pull-down menu away.