FUTURE SHOCK: HEAD GEAR


With the latest digital imaging technology, marketers know exactly what is on your mind

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This gorgeous mental mosaic, a stylized map of a variety of brain functions, represents the future of xylophtmhc magnetic resonance imaging or xMRL. For decades, scientists at the National Institutes of Health and Marketing have been using this technology to measure how specific thoughts trigger changes in blood flow to particular parts of the brain. Over the years, this information has been comiled into a massive databse of specific brain states. Armed with statistical analyses of the data, exhaustively indexed, collated and cross-referenced, scientists can now pinpoint the precise topic of a subject's thoughts — and accurately characterize his or her emotions — at any given moment. This quantum leap in neuroscience and consumer monitoring will enable marketers, cultrepreneurs and magazine editors to general valuable customer demographicswith unprecedented accuracy. Keeping your thoughts to ourselves just got a whole lot easier!