News Quiz Aug. 13, 2001

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1. The EPA has ordered that the Hudson River be dredged for:

a) the last man to complain about Rudolph Giuliani b) ingredients for the new Kevorkian punch c) Henry Hudson's issues of Barely Legal Wenches d) PCB chemicals

2. This man holds an umbrella for Puffy because:

a) the sun is brutal b) if Puffy says it's raining, it's raining c) sweeping the sand in front of him was too demeaning d) even stalkers need a gimmick e) court orders prevent Puffy from holding one

3. Prince Charles lost consciousness after:

a) his mother's doctor said she'll live to 100 b) falling off his horse playing polo c) finding out what being a tampon would really entail d) one whiff of Fergie's new recipe: Spleens and Beans

4. Italy had to close a tourist area because:

a) Pavarotti drank the Trevi fountain b) Mount Etna erupted c) Roberto Benigni won't let go of the Tower of Pisa d) Coliseum ticket takers can't bear to hear "Strength and honor!" anymore

5. The House voted to ban cloning because:

a) James Woods is still alive b) members had ethical concerns c) two Olsen twins are plenty d) Hef is happy with his current system

ANSWERS: 1-d, 2-a, 3-b, 4-b, 5-b