Holiday Trimming

But simplifying isn't always so simple. What one couple decides may not sit well with extended family or with their kids (see box). Three years ago, Noelle Hawton of Bloomington, Minn., was driving to church on Christmas Eve with her husband and his family when they passed a homeless man digging a plate out of a Dumpster. "It made me think about how stupid it was to be stressed out over gifts that none of us really needed," Hawton recalls. That night, she and her in-laws had a long, emotional discussion and chose to stop exchanging gifts the following year. Instead, they adopted a needy family for the holidays and spent a day buying presents for them. Hawton would love to extend the practice to her side of the family, but so far her efforts have failed, and so have other attempts at moderation. One year, her family agreed to limit gift purchases to $15, but everyone panicked, and some overstepped the limit. Another year, they all brought generic gifts and played a dice game to determine who got what--a disaster. This year, for the first time, there will be no gifts among the adults, with one exception. Just as she did last Christmas, Hawton plans to give her parents membership to "Noelle's Soup of the Month Club." Each month, she'll invite them over for a homemade soup dinner. "It gets them out of the house and here spending time with their grandkids," Hawton explains. And it's one way to create memories that last well beyond Christmas Day.