In Embedded, an Iraq-war satire now out on DVD, the Oscar winner mocks the media, the military and the White House. He chatted in his New York City office.
How do you ever get any work done with Filene's Basement at the end of the block?
What's Filene's Basement?
A discount department store.
Did you stop on your way over?
Yeah, that's why I was late.
You should buy something at Filene's, take the bag over to Fifth Avenue and shoplift at the higher-end stores.
Um, the tape recorder is on.
I'm not saying that I would. I'm just trying to get a TIME reporter in trouble. I think we need more controversy at the weekly newsmagazines.
So, who do you think we'll "do" next? Iran? North Korea?
I thought it would be France.
Do you hang out with Michael Moore?
I talk to him occasionally. A couple years ago, I called him up to thank him for taking the heat off of me.
Have you ever met the President?
No. I don't know what happened to my invitation to the White House. We were invited to Clinton's White House, but we didn't go.
You didn't go?
I don't hang around with politicians.
If the Dalai Lama invited you over for tea, would you go to that?
Look, if Clinton called me and said, "Meet me at this bar, and there won't be any press," I'd have no problem with that. But going to the White House is an endorsement.
If you were to filibuster, what would you talk about?
I'd have takeout-delivery menus, and I'd read them and see what people wanted to order.
What happened to your hockey career?
It's not over yet.
I thought with the strike, you might cross a picket line and get some ice time.
Oh, no, you know, I'm a union guy. I still play pickup games three times a week.
You're 46, but people call you baby-faced. What kind of moisturizer do you use?
Kiehl's. But it's the clean living.