Wheels and Deals

Women have for decades done 80% of the shopping for themselves and their families, but it's only recently that we've started purchasing the majority of cars. Today women account for 62% of new-car purchases — yet three-quarters of women buyers plan to bring a man along with them to the dealership, according to a new study by Capital One Auto Finance. Why are women so hesitant to negotiate on their own? "We teach little girls that we don't like them to be greedy, pushy or overly aggressive," says Sara Laschever, co-author of Women Don't Ask: Negotiation and the Gender Divide. "Once adulthood is reached, studies are conclusive that neither men nor other women like women who are too aggressive." In addition, women tend to view negotiations as having two goals: getting the result you want and maintaining (or improving) your relationship with the person on the other side. For example, when you're negotiating your salary with your boss, explains Lois Frankel, author of Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office, you want to preserve a cordial working relationship. But it's important to recognize that some negotiations really have only one goal. And when you're negotiating for a car, getting the best price is all that matters. With that in mind, here are three key negotiating tips:

ARM YOURSELF WITH INFORMATION. There are several great sites cars.com and Edmunds.com, to name two) where you can find the manufacturer's suggested retail price, dealer invoice price and a list of incentives for any car you're interested in. Your starting point in any negotiation should be the invoice price — how much the car cost the dealer. Every penny above that figure is the dealer's profit.

SET A TARGET. There is a direct correlation between the price you're aiming to pay and the price you actually pay, explains Laschever. "Men go in hoping to pay less and then end up paying less, not just when they're purchasing a car but in general. Women set less aggressive targets, and they back down more rapidly." She suggests you set an aggressive but reasonable target based on your research, typically several hundred dollars over the invoice price.

GET READY TO GO FOUR ROUNDS. Experts who teach negotiation say you should be prepared to go four rounds (four back-and-forths) when negotiating for anything. Steel yourself with the knowledge that collaborative negotiating — asking, "Can we find a way that this can work for both of us?"--can be a very effective tactic. It's also one that women tend to be better at than men.

You can e-mail Jean, a columnist, at moneytalk@moneymail.com