Movies: My Childhood, the Movie

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When Swinton's agent called, interrupting our impromptu counseling session, my gaze wandered down the table toward Kelli Garner, who plays Rebecca, the composite girlfriend character. If only, I thought. While trying to turn my memories into fiction, I had allowed myself to imagine such a vixen once, but just for a moment or two because I found the image too distracting. Now I could indulge myself. My youth had returned in a safely distanced form, and at last my painful experiences felt bearable--especially when I finally saw the movie as a member of a larger audience. People were laughing at me the way they always had, but I was laughing at me too, even when my onscreen thumb was in my mouth.

Kirn's new novel, Mission to America (Doubleday), will be published in October