People: Nov. 7, 2005

Quick! Throw Out the Tea! The British are coming. Specifically, that chap with the kilts and all those big homes embarks on his first trip to the U.S. with the new missus this week. PRINCE CHARLES and the former Camilla Parker Bowles will dine at the White House, take in the World Trade Center site and tour organic farms in California. Charles is hoping the visit will boost tourism to Britain and earn him attention for something besides his romantic life, like his recent work on global warming. "The most important thing is to remain relevant," Charles told 60 Minutes of being a royal. "It isn't easy, as you can imagine." A guy who got his house from his mom, married his mistress and is big on the environment--what could be more current than that?

AUTHORS WITH A PEDIGREE So, you're a celebrity and you want to write a book, but there's very little unexplored about your life. You need to do what these folks did: go to the dogs

GLORIA ESTEFAN AND NOELLE Book: The Magically Mysterious Adventures of Noelle the Bulldog Breeds: Conga hitmaker and English bulldog Dogma: Got a unique face? Discover your inner beauty

PARIS HILTON AND TINKERBELL Book: The Tinkerbell Hilton Diaries (by author D. Resin) Breeds: Improbably famous blond and teacup Chihuahua Dogma: Life in a heiress's armpit isn't as glamorous as it looks

CINDY ADAMS AND JAZZY Books: The Gift of Jazzy and (in 2006) Living a Dog's Life Breeds: New York Post's gossip yapper and Yorkshire terrier Dogma: Sly and Liza are cool, but the best friends come with fur

SWOOPES IS OUT BUT NOT DOWN When Houston Comets forward SHERYL SWOOPES became the most prominent team-sport athlete to declare her homosexuality, the strongest reaction was the lack of one. "I feel like I've been living a lie," the WNBA's three-time most valuable player and mom of son Jordan, 8, said. "I'm finally O.K. with the idea of who I love." Swoopes, who has been dating a former coach for seven years, didn't lose her Nike sneaker deal or her role as the sweetheart of the league, which has a strong lesbian fan base. In fact, she picked up a new endorsement, for a gay cruise line. Trailblazing tennis lesbian Martina Navratilova, meanwhile, is waiting for her thank-you note.

Q&A SARAH SILVERMAN

Comic Sarah Silverman's movie, Jesus Is Magic, opens Nov. 11.

Are any topics off limits for you? This is ridiculous and nonsensical because [in my act] I trivialize rape and the Holocaust, but the only thing I can think of that really bums me out is jokes about fat women. That said, if there's a joke out there about any topic that's funny, it's worth it.

Your sister co-stars in your film. What does your family make of your often off-color work? Sometimes my mom, her thing is, "I have a very visual mind." My dad does not have a very visual mind. Either that or he's sick. 'Cause he's fine with it.

Your sister is also in your Comedy Central pilot. Yeah, but she plays my sister in that one. In my movie she plays my friend. She's very versatile. She's a real John Malkovich.

What do you think of people who say women aren't funny? I couldn't care less. It's such an absurd generalization. It's like saying black people hate lemonade. Any woman comic who's hurt by that or offended by it, chances are she's not funny.