Book Excerpt: The Rest of Your Life

(3 of 4)

The man who gave Nazrudin its name and mission, and who remains life planning's guru-in-chief, is George Kinder (rhymes with "tinder"). Now in his late 50s, Kinder grew up in a small town in the Midwest. He went off to Harvard, where he majored in economics, but found greater meaning in classic literature and philosophy. Eventually he chucked academia, moving to a Massachusetts farmhouse "to live a life of spiritual practice and writing." This life plan struck his parents as an enlightened pathway to material nowhere. His mother suggested that he try accounting. For the next 13 years, Kinder worked as a CPA, building a broad base of clients in Cambridge whom he attracted with flyers he attached to windshields on frosty mornings. Now and then he found himself counseling a client on an emotional issue, and locals began to refer to him as "the tax therapist." In time Kinder fell under the sway of the questions posed at Nazrudin retreats.

Kinder still maintains a planning practice near Harvard Square. He also spends time on [the Hawaiian island of] Maui. But mostly he's intent on turning old-style financial planning inside out. For Kinder, life planning isn't a flaky version of financial planning--it's where the profession needs to go, "financial planning done right," he flatly states. A few years ago, he established the Kinder Institute to train traditional planners to be more empathetic, to ask the right questions, to remake themselves into "torchbearers" who can help light the way for clients who need to figure out what they really want out of life, then build a financial plan to make it happen.

Last fall I attended one of Kinder's three-day workshops, a memorable stop on the angel-of-doomsday tour. There, in a room filled with 90 straight-laced financial advisers, Kinder staged his signature training exercise: the Three Big Questions. Kinder claims that he asks himself these questions several times a year as a way of staying focused on his personal priorities.

Kinder instructed the planners to write their answers down, not just think about them. He introduced question No. 1: "It's a fun question," he said calmly, a gentle smile on his face. "Assume that you've got all the money you need. Maybe you're not Warren Buffett, but you'll never have to worry about money again. The question is, What would you do with it? How would you live? Think for a moment, then write the answer down." Instantly the room filled with the sound of scribbling.

Next question. "You go to the doctor, who discovers you have a rare illness. He says that you're going to feel perfectly fine for the next five years, but then the illness will prove fatal. It will come suddenly, causing no suffering. The question is, Now that you know that your life will be over by then, how will you live it? What will you do?" The planners stare off into the distance for a short time, then start scribbling, less furiously than before.

The final question. "You go to the doctor. You feel perfectly healthy. Again the doctor explains that you have a serious illness. But this time the doctor says, 'You have only 24 hours to live.' What did you miss? Who did you not get to be? What did you not get to do?" The room was silent. After a while, each planner jotted down a phrase or two.