"We have concluded that FEMA is in shambles and beyond repair."
SUSAN COLLINS, chairman of the Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee, which recommended last week that the troubled disaster agency be abolished
"The Iranian nation won't give a damn about such useless resolutions."
MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD, President of Iran, which defied the United Nations Security Council's deadline last week to end its nuclear program or face punitive resolutions
"You've got to recognize there are limits to how much corn can be used for ethanol. I mean, after all, we got to eat some."
PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH, hedging his commitment to corn-based ethanol fuels
"We have forced the autocratic powers to eat dust."
MADHAV KUMAR NEPAL, leader of the Communist Party of Nepal, after King Gyanendra agreed, in the wake of deadly protests, to reconvene the elected parliament, which he had dissolved in 2002
"Prodi won't last long."
SILVIO BERLUSCONI, Italian Prime Minister, who indicated plans to step down this week after having refused to concede his April 10 defeat to Romano Prodi, following the closest election in modern Italian history
"I guess you could say in the last few years I've achieved the American nightmare."
KENNETH LAY, former Enron chief executive, testifying at his trial on charges of conspiring to defraud investors
"We have children getting killed by gang leaders and dope dealers. We have real issues here ... And we're dealing with foie gras?"
RICHARD DALEY, Chicago Mayor, after the City Council approved a ban on the sale of foie gras on the grounds that production of fatty duck and goose livers requires inhumane treatment of the birds
"If you are planning a trip to Six Flags, you might want to check if they are open first."
SARA BECKMAN, eighth-grader at O'Brien Middle School in Reno, Nev., after a trip to an amusement park to reward honor students ended abruptly when the buses encountered locked gates
Sources: Washington Post; AP (2); Washington Post; AGI; New York Times; Chicago Sun-Times; Reno Gazette-Journal