Doing the Splits

Breaking up is hard to do--too hard for some people. But thanks to new breakup services--think the opposite of dating agencies--wannabe ex-boyfriends and ex-girlfriends can tell their partner it's over without having to say it themselves. You can have it done on TV: on her Oxygen show Breaking Up, Shannen Doherty ends relationships that have gone sour. A lower-profile agent is German entrepreneur Bernd Dressler, nicknamed "the Terminator." He will dump your significant other by phone (the "Let's Stay Friends" call and the more insistent "Stay Away" cost $25 each) or in person ($63). Then there's a less human option: DumpMonkey.com For $24.95, the dumpee gets a 16-in. stuffed monkey, a certificate stating the date and time the relationship ended and a phone call to verify that the breakup is for real. All that, plus free shipping.