Nice Girls Get Even

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Don't be fooled by the sugarcoating. This book is a blast fired at Frankel and the tenets of first-wave feminist work advice. Whereas Frankel advises women to strengthen their business muscles by learning to play sports ("Business is a game and you can win it"), the Nice authors counsel women to help their enemies and compliment the competition: "We completely disagree with the conventional wisdom that 'nice guys finish last' and 'no good deed goes unpunished.' Our culture has helped to propagate the myth of social Darwinism--of the survival of the fittest--that the cutthroat 'me vs. you philosophy' wins the day." (Alas, it may be that neither style will prove effective. A 2004 Stanford Graduate School of Business study found that "women who enact stereotypically supportive feminine behaviors may be liked but seen as less competent, while women who enact aggressive behaviors risk being disliked and disqualified for gendered leadership roles." Who triumphs? Traditionally masculine men, say the authors.)

Who are these nice ladies? They're the powers behind the Kaplan Thaler Group, a hot New York City ad agency that had $900 million in billings last year. The duo created the iconic AFLAC duck, and clients include Procter & Gamble, Continental Airlines, Pfizer, Revlon and Office Depot. Thaler and Koval attribute their success in part to practicing what they preach in their 195-employee office. (Of course, having terrific creative work helps too.) At Kaplan Thaler, everyone gets a callback, and every résumé gets answered. "We may not have a job for somebody," says Thaler, "but everybody deserves the respect of not having their résumé thrown in the garbage."

What are the notions of niceness? Everything your mother told you: smile more, pay attention, cooperate, fine-tune your listening skills, collaborate and share credit. Being nice doesn't conflict with being a leader or making difficult choices. It's a question of style: "In the end, being a cheerleader is far more effective than being a drill sergeant," the book advises.

The pair are keenly aware they are bucking the long-standing baseball-and-business axiom that nice guys and girls finish last. Says Thaler: "We couldn't find one marketing book anywhere--and we combed through all of them--that had one sentence about the fact, 'Oh, and by the way, you should give a client a more comfortable seat, pick up their bags at the airport, compliment them on their ties.'" That's why the authors dismiss old think about office demeanor: "'Mean' to us is so last millennium."

Nice has company too. Another new book preaching kindness is The Girl's Guide to Being a Boss (Without Being a Bitch) (Morgan Road), by marketing professionals Caitlin Friedman and Kimberly Yorio. As the title trumpets, the B-word is the dreaded description to have hurled at you in anger. In an amusing chick-lit, women's magazine patter (the boss is the "chick-in-charge"), the authors counsel being your authentic, feminine self. "Were our mothers and grandmothers fighting for us to go to college and get jobs we enjoy so we could be forced into sensible shoes and rayon business suits? We hope not." Says co-author Friedman: "We really think that if women are themselves in business, then that is a huge strength. If you're a feminine person, being comfortable with that femininity, bringing it to the office, can be a strength."