Single Moms Unite

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In Dearborn, Mich., Jessaca Sanchez, 19, a college student with a 22-month-old son, shares a home rented by Sue Yowell, 47, the dean of student affairs at the University of Detroit Mercy, and her two sons, 7 and 8. Despite the women's age difference, they feel connected by single motherhood. "We talk about how the world is not geared for single parents," says Sanchez, "and we both say it's up to us to raise a good generation of men." The women split housework evenly, and Yowell picks up a larger share of household expenses. For Yowell, the benefits are beyond economics. She sometimes gets called back to campus for late-night emergencies. Before sharing a home with Sanchez, she says, "my kids would have to come with me. It's a relief to be able to leave them with Jessaca."

Some moms are moving in together in even larger groups. In Anaheim, Calif., four moms, ages 26 to 49, share a four-bedroom house. They have seven kids among them and met through Sole Support, "the single parent family network" (www.solesupport online.com). One of the moms, Yolanda Torres, 26, says a small apartment would cost her about $900. "Here, the other women give me emotional support, the kids play together, there's a pool, and my rent is just $550."

Some single dads are also seeking housemates. Curtis Batiste, 45, is using RoommateAccess.com to find a family or single mom in the Chicago area who would welcome him and his daughter, 7. "I'd like my daughter to be in an environment where she could relate to a woman," says Batiste, who is sifting through 114 potential matches.

There are risks, of course, to home sharing. Kristen Lam, 29, says she and her son, 5, spent almost a year sharing a home with an acquaintance "who pawned her child off on me. She'd sneak out in the middle of the night." Still Lam remained committed to the housemate concept because it made sense financially and she felt her son needed a playmate. She interviewed 10 prospects, but no one seemed right. Then Lam met Laura Fettig, 32, and her daughter Erika, 5, at a McDonald's last summer. Fettig, too, had been considering going online to look for a roommate. They hit it off and moved in together in Redondo Beach, Calif.

As the single-parent population grows, such arrangements may become more common. Helena Tuma, 33, and her daughter, 3, share an apartment near Los Angeles with Anne Barber, 28, and her son, 5. They recently looked into renting a house together--they plan to sign a one-year lease--and a real estate agent assumed they were a lesbian couple. They are not, but Tuma says their platonic friendship has advantages over married life. "It's like having a marriage," explains Tuma, "without all the ties and the yucky stuff."