Upsides of the Downturn

The

boom times of the '90s were not just an economic story; they changed the lives of families too. Dads jetted around the country, moms could afford to give up their jobs, and families everywhere dreamed about new diplomas and big promotions. But family life was transformed again when the current slowdown began in March 2001. Two million Americans lost their jobs, while others saw their paychecks shrink. How is the changed economy affecting their emotional welfare? "Money is the physical manifestation of who you are. It defines you," says certified financial planner and best-selling personal-finance author Suze Orman. "When you lose it, you lose part of yourself." That may be true, but an economic setback can also give families an opportunity to figure out what really matters in their lives. And some are finding that there can be upsides to the downturn.

Putting Family First
David Wu's career thrived in the '90s. In just three years, he went from being a mid-level performance analyst in Washington to being a general manager for Allied Signal (now Honeywell) in Shanghai. The management job came with a mid-six-figure income, but it also required David, 45, to travel almost constantly, averaging 80 hours a month on planes. In 1995 David, his wife Elly, now 42, and their three children, Letitia, 14, Lawrence, 12, and Lennifer, 10, moved to China, hoping David would be able to spend more time with the family. But he wasn't, and the effects began to show. Letitia and Lennifer stopped doing homework, and Lawrence started getting into fights. "I was concerned about the kids' issues, and David wanted to deal more with them, but he was too busy," says Elly. After four years the Wus decided to return to Virginia. David quickly found a comparable job at Teligent, and when that company went bankrupt just 10 months later, he signed on with Tyco. The hitch: he would have to resume a hectic flying schedule. So, when all three children were selected to join the prestigious American Youth Orchestra as violinists, David missed their concerts. He was also away for their basketball, soccer and volleyball games. And when he was home, he was so jet-lagged that he often fell asleep while watching movies with the family. Elly was worried about what kind of message he was sending to the kids. "I told him, 'If someday you feel like the kids only need you financially, don't get upset with them, because that's what you taught them.'"

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Then last spring news about the alleged mishandling of company funds by Tyco's top management began to leak out. David wanted to leave the company but was afraid he would not find work in a bad economy. Elly encouraged him to make the break, but David waited until the school year was over to ask the kids how they would feel about his quitting. "My children were mature enough to tell me, 'Daddy, you told us we have to pursue what we want to do; you should too,'" he says with emotion.

Since David had been with Tyco only a year, he didn't have much retirement savings in the company's deflated stock, and he had put aside enough to live on for a year if the family budgeted carefully. The Wus have cut out vacations, and instead of playing games on the latest souped-up PC, David and the kids are working on a less pricey 3,000-piece jigsaw puzzle. But the transition hasn't been easy. Elly admits that she had got so used to his not being around that she sometimes forgets to involve David in family decisions. The kids, while happy he's home, sometimes don't know how to treat him either. "He's been trying to make it all up in a short period of time," says Elly. "We all need time to warm up again." David is doing some consulting, but he has started thinking about how to look for a job in an economy in which so many executives are competing for work. "Right now I am almost guaranteed that my compensation will be low," he says. But even if there's an opportunity to earn more, he has decided that he will not travel until the kids are of college age. "My family is growing up on me," he says. "They have to come first."

Making a Fresh Start
Having your own business is the dream of millions of Americans, and Michael Ross realized his when he and a partner launched a film-production company in New York City in 1999. Michael, now 39, was not raking in a six-figure salary like his ecounterparts in nearby Silicon Alley, but his income was comfortable enough so that his wife Cindy Cordes, 31, could stay home with their daughter Ella, 4, and the couple could afford to send Ella to a $7,000-a-year private preschool, have regular dates at nice restaurants and take advantage of the booming market by investing in mutual funds. But by the time their son Asher was born in February 2001, the economy was running out of steam, most of Michael's clients were running away, and the family's investments were tanking.