Between The Sexes

Tutty's parents never told her she had undergone surgery as an infant to make her more female in appearance. Looking back, she thinks they made the right decision but wishes they had been more forthcoming. Since discovering her intersexuality, Tutty has decided to stop dating men. "I had this fear that if the truth about me came out, things could get ugly," she says. For nearly a year, she has been happily involved with a woman. "Things have turned out well for me," Tutty says. "A lot of intersex people never feel O.K. in relationships or even find partners."

Relationships are one thing, but even everyday paperwork can be a problem. Elijah Hobbs, 26, was raised as a girl in Cicero, Ind. At puberty, his body developed both feminine and masculine features — breasts but broad shoulders and a deep voice. It became more difficult to pass as a girl, and Hobbs eventually came to think of himself as male. At 24, he legally changed his sex to male, and in January he underwent surgery to have his breasts and ovaries removed. To get medical coverage, he told his insurance company he was a woman. After all, what guy would require these operations?

Elijah, Julanne and Sherri all would have found life easier if less embarrassment and secrecy were associated with their condition. That's a goal the Intersex Society is working toward. Meanwhile, scientists hope that more sophisticated testing will eventually help doctors and families make more informed choices about how to treat intersexuals. New research on the genetics of sexual development shows, for example, that several of the genes that influence sex are not even located on the X or Y chromosomes. What it all boils down to, says Dr. Eric Vilain, a professor of human genetics, pediatrics and urology at UCLA, is that the roots of gender identity are much more complex than anyone thought. But Kelli could have told them that.