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"I don't think you give timelines to dictators."
GEORGE W. BUSH, on wrangling with North Korea and Iran over their suspected nuclear weapons programs

"We kill all blacks and even kill our cattle when they have black calves."
JANJAWEED MILITIA MEMBER, as quoted by a refugee from Darfur, Sudan, in a U.S. report investigating whether the militia's actions there constitute genocide

"We've found a string of ... fundamental failures throughout all levels of command, from the soldiers on the ground to the Central Command and to the Pentagon."
TILLIE FOWLER, member of the U.S. government panel investigating the abuse of Iraqi prisoners by American soldiers

"One day he's saying that we were shooting civilians, cutting off their ears, cutting off their heads, throwing away his medals or his ribbons. The next day he's standing there, 'I want to be President because I'm a Vietnam veteran.'"
BOB DOLE, former Republican presidential candidate and World War II veteran, criticizing Democratic nominee John Kerry's stance on his war experiences

"You'd be amazed at the number of people who want to introduce themselves to you in the men's room."
JOHN KERRY, talking about life on the campaign trail

"If things go right, I'll be there about a week, and if things don't go right, I'll be there about an hour-and-a-half."
RODNEY DANGERFIELD, U.S. comedian, before undergoing successful surgery to replace a heart valve last week