GERMANY: Entire Youth

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Queer Colonel Ernst Roehm, affectionate Chief of Staff of the apple-cheeked Nazi Storm Troops, speaking in their defense last week for the first time since he was raised to Cabinet rank, revealed that Germany now has 2,500,000 Storm Troopers, her regular Army being limited to 100,000.

"The brown uniform," cried Colonel Roehm, "is completely unsuitable as a field uniform. It offers no protection against inclemency of the weather. I don't believe that an unprejudiced military expert of any army in the world could honestly designate the brown uniform as one practical for war. . . . I deny that the Storm Troops can be regarded as a military force! . . . Today almost the entire youth of England, France, Italy, the United States, Poland and Russia are not only clothed in uniforms which correspond to the respective Army uniforms in cut, but they are openly being trained by active and reserve Army officers with weapons for war service."

When flabbergasted U. S. correspondents asked Colonel Roehm what he meant by his reference to the military training of the "entire youth" of the U. S. he snapped, "I have not been to America!"