Education: Adventures of Heloise
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While news of the incipient publication of College Humor's pictures spread over Drake last fortnight, "Bus" Bergmann was enraged to find printed in the daily Times-Delphic one of Heloise's earlier publicity portraits. It showed most of her and was slyly captioned "Today's Hot Tip." The editor of the offending issue was a 160-lb. student named Dan Anderson of Salt Lake City. Before he knew it he was hauled out of his office by "Bus" Bergmann and told to take his hands out of his pockets. He declined and woke up in a University washroom. Editor Anderson had loyal "Bus" Bergmann arrested for assault and battery, at which point Heloise and Drake began to make headlines. "Bus" Bergmann, insisting that he was contending "for a lady's honor," was given a suspended sentence of 15 days.
Last week this chronicle, which lacked only words & music to make it a typical college musical film, became a national story when College Humor appeared with its four-page spread of eight pictures on "A Day in the Life of a Co-Ed." Heloise was shown climbing out of her double-decker bed in the morning, showering behind a transparent curtain, snaking into a dress, taking notes in class, posed outside with a bow & arrow in a bathing suit, posed inside again "practicing a few dance steps," dancing at a Des Moines hotspot with "Bus" Bergmann, and, also with Friend Bergmann, in the "lingering reality of a good-night kiss."
Armed with these spectacular pictures, the Des Moines press descended on Drake to find out what awful thing was going to happen to Heloise. Nothing did. Manager Parsons of the Show Boat shot Motherly Dean of Women Carrie Taylor Cubbage an earnest wire: HELOISE MARTIN IS A GOOD GIRL STOP SHE IS ONE GIRL UNSPOILED BY BROADWAY. And Heloise convinced Dean Cubbage (but nobody else) that she had not posed nude in the shower, as the picture indicated, but in a "flesh leotard, which is similar to a bathing suit. And besides I understood the picture would show only from the shoulders up." Business Man ager Lytton sputtered that he had labored under the same misunderstanding. Snapped the Dean : "Drake does not intend to take any action." At week's end the New York World-Telegram, was able to make it known, in a fitting cinematic denouement to Heloise's adventures, that "it is only by chance that today the management of the Hollywood Restaurant . . . announced that Heloise Martin is coming back. There, as before, Miss Martin will toe-tap, perform in the chorus line and dance a number with a jumping rope. . . . Honest, we didn't think it would turn out this way."
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