Foreign News: A Louse for a Louse

Lightheartedly, French Novelist Pierre Daninos said yes when ECA asked him to write the captions for a NATO movie cartoon. Then, because this made him a foreign employee of a U.S. Government agency, Daninos received the usual four-page questionnaire asking about his 1) birth & parentage, 2) complexion & distinctive body marks, 3) emotional & mental state, 4) drinking habits, 5) aliases, if any, 6) connections with the Communist Party, if any, 7) past & present employment in detail—and some 50 other questions. Daninos filled in the questionnaire, named three character references, duly swore that he had no intention of "upsetting the U.S. Government by force or violence."

Eight days later, Daninos received a second questionnaire repeating many of the previous questions. Daninos blew up. Last week the Paris Figaro frontpaged a Daninos letter to President Truman. Said Daninos: "Being only vaguely informed about the U.S., I would like to proceed with an 'investigation check.'" Sample questions directed at the U.S.: "1) What were you doing before the discovery of America? (List of residences before and after 1492—complete history of employment.) 2) What is your complexion? Distinctive marks and characteristics? 3) References: give the names of three major and responsible countries, not related to you by blood or alliance, qualified to give precise information about you. 4) Are you suffering from any serious troubles? (Political? Mental? Epidemic?). 5) May I consider that during the course of the past twelve months none among you has drunk alcoholic liquor to excess? Oui? Non?" In case some might think him anti-American, Daninos explained: "I am nothing but a damned individualist who would not seek the tiniest louse on the head of the United States if they would not try to find one on mine."