Theater: Wheeze-Bang

All-American is a crazy mixed-up dodderer of a musical. The first act is a throwback to the old-fashioned football college comedy where education consists of numskull sessions and coeducation of necking sessions. The second (and last) act plunks a few blank cartridges into Madison Avenue, the most oversimplified U.S. symbol of evil since George F. Babbitt. To compound the sense of the archaic, the hero tumbles onstage with a planeload of European fellow immigrants to raise an Ellis-Islandish plea of ''melt us" before audiences that would rather be caught naked than stewing in the common pot of conformism.

As Professor Stanislaus Fodorski....