AUSTRALIA: Name oj Decency!

In a lusty new land like Australia, many a citizen is as violently playful as an old fashioned Wild West cowboy. Last week there were Wild West doings when Premier John Thomas Lang of New South Wales tried to open the world's largest single-arch bridge, a mighty mass of steel flung across Sydney harbor.

Two days before the bridge inaugural, some members of the British House of Commons were talking with the Agent in London of the State of New South Wales, Mr. A. C. Willis. They told him they had learned of a plot in Sydney to pick up six-foot Premier Lang just as he was opening the bridge and throw him overboard into Sydney harbor, 172 ft. below.

Knowing his fellow Australians, Agent Willis could easily believe them capable of such a playful plot. He rushed from the House of Commons, dashed off a cable to Premier Lang, discovered next morning that London's urbane Press thought "someone has been pulling Mr. Willis' leg." In England Premiers are not tossed off bridges. That even Australians would plot such a thing is to Englishmen quite unthinkable.

Meanwhile Sydney seethed. Sydney is the Capital of New South Wales and its agent in London is, in Sydney's eyes, almost an ambassador. If Agent Willis had seen fit to warn Premier Lang, extraordinary precautions must be taken against the "plot."

Mounted and pedestrian police formed a solid phalanx around tall Premier Lang and the Governor of New South Wales, Sir Philip Game, as they advanced to cut the ribbon that would open Sydney's "Dream of the Century." Royal Air Force planes were buzzing high above, prepared to dive under the arch at the historic moment. Massed below the bridge was a fleet of 150 motorboats. A salute of 21 guns had begun, a band had burst into "Advance, Australia Fair!" and six-foot Premier Lang was advancing with his shiny pair of scissors—when suddenly a man on a horse spurred forward from the ranks of mounted police brandishing a sword.

"I, an officer of the Commonwealth," he shouted, "in the name of common decency declare this bridge open!" and with a swish of his sword the man on horseback cut the ribbon.

"I am," added the man, introducing himself, "Captain de Groot of the Royal Hussars!"

Since Premier Lang is not exactly popular, the Australian crowd raised a Wild West cheer, massed around Hero de Groot of the Royal Hussars and menaced policemen who tried to arrest him.

But by dogged persistence the police won their point, took Captain de Groot into custody on a charge of "offensive behavior."

The severed ribbon was tied together. Premier Lang cut it with his shiny scissors. On behalf of His Majesty George V, "of Australia King," Sir Philip Game read a message.

On foot the official party then trudged to the North Sydney end of Sydney's Dream where the Mayor of North Sydney was waiting to cut another ribbon with the very pair of scissors used by Mayor James John ("Jimmy") Walker to open the Bayonne Bridge linking New Jersey to Staten Island.