FRACTURED FAIRY TALE

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She also embraced therapies for herself, spending as much as $12,000 a year on colonic irrigation and aromatherapy. Though tabloid stories about her troubles have circulated for years, it was startling to hear the Princess talk freely in the Panorama interview about the times when she suffered from "rampant bulimia" and attempted to mutilate herself: "I just hurt my arms and my legs." Diana acknowledged her affair with James Hewitt, who authorized a tell-all book. The interview also revealed that she has mastered current pop-psych speak: alluding to other women who harm themselves physically, she said, "I'm able to understand completely where they're coming from." Though she claims to have felt worthless, she finally had the courage of her frailties. As usual, she put her message across: the television audience averaged a record 21 million, and polls showed that the public supported her overwhelmingly.

Hell will freeze over before Charles says he knows where anyone is coming from. In matters of semantics alone, the distance between this royal pair is obvious. In any public speaking, he is reticent about personal references. The deficiencies in his upbringing are becoming clearer. In 1994, anxious to present his side of an increasingly difficult separation, he made a TV film and authorized a biography, both by British broadcaster Jonathan Dimbleby. Charles cited his distant parents, especially his authoritarian father, for some of his difficulties. Hardly a gentlemanly thing to do, but his point is underscored in a new biography, Elizabeth, by Sarah Bradford, a well-connected British author.

As a little boy, Charles was left in the care of nannies, who were followed by the paramilitary masters of Gordonstoun school. In his day, Philip had conquered this remote Scottish outpost. He was a born leader and a natural athlete; his son was neither. Back at the palace Charles had to confront his little sister Anne, who had all her father's gifts and a confident personality. All Charles had was grit. After finally slogging through Cambridge and a stint in the navy that he found difficult, he had his own ideas about being the heir apparent, and they distanced him from his mother and sovereign. By the time he undertook the biographical film and the book, he neither consulted nor informed her of his plan.

For a period in Charles' youth, Earl Mountbatten, Philip's uncle and a tireless meddler in the family's affairs, acted in place of both Charles' parents. After Mountbatten's death came such gurus as South African-born writer Sir Laurens Van der Post. If Diana turned to various therapies, Charles explored exotic lore, became a "green" and an organic gardener. Before long the tabloids had him talking to his carrots at Highgrove.

Now Charles' circle is dominated by his mistress Parker Bowles; his foghorn friend Nicholas Soames, Minister of State for the Armed Forces; and Mountbatten's daughter Patricia. Perhaps the person closest to him is his private secretary, Richard Aylard, whose influence is extensive and widely questioned. In truth, Charles has the survival smarts of a baby seal. Aylard urged the Dimbleby project on him; his idea seemed to be that to know the Prince was to love him.