CINEMA: TWISTED WIRE: CABLE GUY IS AS CONTORTED AS A JIM CARREY FACE

He will organize a merry game of porno Password with your parents, supply you with a prostitute when you're horny, beat up a rival trying to make time with your estranged girlfriend. Beware the cable guy bearing gifts. Indeed, beware anyone emerging out of the hostile anonymity of modern city life who is too anxious to assuage your anomie. If bitter experience has taught our paranoia anything, it's that excesses of accommodation are all too often aggression's most winsome disguise.

There's a good, crystallizing movie to be made out of that thought. But The Cable Guy is not it, mostly because...