People: Sep. 14, 1998

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RELATIVE TALENT

Maybe there should be a rack in record stores for Relatives of Famous Musicians. Last week it was announced that a posthumous album of the work of LINDA MCCARTNEY, whose considerable talents were widely held to exclude singing, will be released in November. Before she died earlier this year, McCartney made an album of songs she had recorded over the past 20 years. The album, Wide Prairie, could be joined in the Relatives rack by recent releases from Eagle-Eye Cherry, son of Don, brother of Neneh; Adam Cohen, son of Leonard; Bijou Phillips, daughter of Mamas & Papas John Phillips, and an upcoming one from Sally Taylor, daughter of James Taylor and Carly Simon. Hmmm: Can Lourdes Ciccone hold a microphone yet?

GRUMPY OLD MAN, PART ONE

CHARLTON HESTON, you adorably cranky gun-toting thing, you. Is it because you're president of the N.R.A. that you feel you can shoot from both hips? In an industry in which public criticism is an unforgivable faux pas if not a cardinal sin, you opened fire on two of show-biz-land's most beloved citizens. First there was the charming advice you told the New York Daily News you gave ROBERT DE NIRO, that he ought to do Shakespeare. "It's ridiculous for an actor that good to keep playing Las Vegas hoods. That's terrible," you said. Never mind that he's only actually played one Las Vegas hood. And then you opined that except for his roles in the movies A Few Good Men and Five Easy Pieces, all JACK NICHOLSON's parts were the same. "You can't just do the same thing over and over," you said. Well, thanks for the words of wisdom. What's more, you might have added, neither of them has made any films with apes.

GRUMPY OLD MEN, THE SEQUEL

One of the joys of being hoary of head is that you can speak frankly without grounding your career. So when Vanity Fair hunted down some ex-astronauts to ask what they thought of John Glenn's jaunt into the great blue yonder, they were none too starry-eyed. "John Glenn a payload specialist? That's bulls____," said FRANK BORMAN, second from left. "NASA could get better data monitoring him for 10 days in bed." WALLY SCHIRRA, far left, was similarly wry. "I can think of several more Senators we should boost into space." Even JIM LOVELL, second from right, next to TOM STAFFORD, said the Glenn flight was all about p.r. But Eugene Cernan, the last human to moonwalk, differs. "I don't care if John just stares out the window for 10 days," he said. "He's earned it."

IS EMPTY IN THIS YEAR?

Models and food: Who thought that would work? CLAUDIA SCHIFFER has become the second superthin catwalker--Christy Turlington broke away last year--to pull out of Fashion Cafe. In a statement, Schiffer said her continued involvement was made "simply impossible" by "old problems" at the chain. Fashion Cafe founder Tommaso Buti has had problems paying bills, but a Cafe flack insists this wasn't why Schiffer left. It's another ripped seam for the eatery, which has recently seen closings of its Barcelona and New Orleans outlets. And, of course, there's a lawsuit. Investor Luigi Palma is suing Buti, claiming embezzlement, a claim Buti denies. Is it time for the other stiletto to drop?

ACTING FUNNY