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NO FAT LADIES, EITHER Disney recently asked Elton John and Tim Rice to update Aida, the opera about an Egyptian's doomed love for an Ethiopian slave. They did more than just lighten the tone. While Verdi has Egyptians making garlands for soldiers, John and Rice have the Spice Girls singing about panties.

VERDI "Weave the lotus and the laurel/into a crown for the victors! Let a soft cloud of flowers/veil the steel of their arms."

JOHN "Overwear, underwear, anytime, anywhere... That in negligee or formal/I am anything but normal That dress has always been my strongest suit."


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VLADIMIR PUTIN, Russian Prime Minister, reassuring a governing party congress that Russia will weather its current financial crisis without suffering the trauma of past financial collapses in 1991 and 1998




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