Letters: Apr. 12, 2004

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The Case for Staying Home

Women will finally be liberated when they stop listening to experts and do what their hearts and minds tell them is best for their families. ANDREA CEONZO Poughkeepsie, N.Y.

Your story on moms who are choosing to stay home to take care of their children was infuriating [March 22]. As if those of us who don't have a choice and must go to work to provide health insurance, retirement benefits and college savings for our children need yet another reason to feel that we are doing something wrong, that we are lacking as mothers. Like most American women with kids, I hold a job because I have to. Thanks to the national economic conditions, I'm going to need to continue working. And believe me, come Election Day in November, on my way to work I will be voting. ANDREA GOYETTE Sacramento, Calif.

Although a significant portion of American families must have two incomes to make ends meet, more families are realizing the importance of having a stay-at-home parent, whether it is the mother or the father. Children are the legacy we leave to society. Very few people, at the end of their lives, wish they could have spent more time at work. CHERYL HILLMAN Alpharetta, Ga.

Women who expect to find their jobs and salaries waiting for them when they return to the workplace had better understand the harsh reality of choosing diapers over spreadsheets. While these mothers are away from the workplace, plenty of talented women are willing to take, not hold, their places. LISA GIASSA Bogota, N.J.

What about us stay-at-home dads? I have been one for three years. Our family has made many sacrifices, but I would not trade anything for the joy I see every day on the faces of my daughter and son. Kids are young for only so long. Once they are in school, I will go back to work, but for now I have the most prestigious title in the world: Daddy. STEVE JONES Atlanta

I stayed home with my two children, now 12 and 10, and enjoyed it thoroughly. I was very fortunate that my husband's salary made that choice possible, and I never doubted that it was the right decision for our family. Recently, however, my husband unexpectedly left me, and I realize I have put myself in a precarious position by losing those years in the work force. Anyone who is deciding whether to stay home with children needs to examine carefully the risks as well as the joys. MARIAM VAN WESENBEECK Fishers, Ind.

Enlightened and pragmatic firms across the country have optimized their talent pools by making it possible for those of us who want to continue working to participate fully in raising a family as well as having a career. A woman who seeks out a company that offers part-time and other flexible arrangements can remain at work and gain the experience and skills needed to reach the top of her profession. Members of our legal network, Interlaw Ltd., know it is possible to raise a happy family while also enjoying a successful, fulfilling career. CATHERINE DEBONO HOLMES, CHAIR WOMEN LAWYERS OF INTERLAW Los Angeles

Once you have children, life is no longer about you. It shouldn't matter whether you push a broom or serve as a FORTUNE 500 CEO. Kids are job No. 1. JON HOLLANDER Park Ridge, Ill.

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