A First Family. Redefined

The schemes, the betrayals, the bawdy jokes over pasta, crass relatives, uncontrollable appetites, subpoenas, cigars and truckloads of stolen baubles. America has been transfixed by the Clinton family foibles. But now that The Sopranos are back from hiatus, viewers may have to choose which family drama merits their attention

THE Sopranos

THE BOSS Charismatic big man with mother issues, Tony Soprano has eluded the feds for years; will stolen plane tickets be his downfall?

SCORNED WIFE Long-suffering bottle-blond Carmela Soprano turns a blind eye to her husband's faults, mostly for material gain

DUTIFUL DAUGHTER Top student and lyrically named Meadow Soprano is wise to the family biz, can't wait to get away to college

CONSIGLIERE Savvy psychiatrist Dr. Jennifer Melfi, Tony's therapist, has problems of her own: sees a shrink, keeps a bottle in the drawer

BAD BLOOD Zaftig sister Janice schemes for dollars; fiery writer-nephew Chris trades on family name

THE Clintons

THE BOSS Charismatic big man with mother issues, Bill Clinton has eluded the feds for years; will the pardons be his downfall?

SCORNED WIFE Long-suffering bottle-blond Hillary Clinton turns a blind eye to her husband's faults, mostly for political gain

DUTIFUL DAUGHTER Top student and lyrically named Chelsea Clinton is wise to the family biz, can't wait to get back to Stanford, 3,000 mi. away

CONSIGLIERE Savvy prayer master Rev. Jesse Jackson, Clinton's moral adviser, has problems of his own: sees other women, keeps a baby on the West Coast

BAD BLOOD Orb-shaped bro-in-law Hugh schemes for dollars; sunny half bro Roger trades on family name