Letters: May 21, 2001

The Quest for a Superkid

Pressure didn't make kids smarter 10 years ago, and more pressure won't make them geniuses today [THE PARENT TRAP, April 30]. I think we all would have grown to be happier adults if we had had enough time to play when we were children--and we wouldn't have become so obsessed with getting our children to the top of the moneymaking pyramid. There are more important things in life than being rich, like having fun. MAKELLA CRAELIUS Somerset, N.J.

How refreshing to read that people are realizing that kids need to be kids. I cringe when I see small children walking home from elementary school with full backpacks. Play and time to be creative and wonder and wander, and time to be with family members, are so important for children's intellectual growth--and they wouldn't hurt us adults either. MARLA B. RAMIREZ Ukiah, Calif.

Re the alleged IQ-boosting effect of the music of Bach and Mozart: we should be encouraging children to listen to it not for how it stimulates the brain but for how it stimulates the heart. BARBARA KLASKIN HARRIS Los Angeles

In trying to tease out the factors that gave rise to the recent findings that children in day care become more aggressive and attention seeking, are we perhaps looking in the wrong direction? Maybe it isn't the day care that makes the difference but the parents. Perhaps parents whose children are in day care are very stressed out, busy and preoccupied when at home, and therefore the children develop demanding behaviors. PEARL O. HOBERMAN Teaneck, N.J.

What kids really need is parents and other adults who pay attention. A study that finds only a mother can provide good child care is inaccurate. Is a short-tempered mother better than a patient caregiver? Is an uninterested mother better than an involved father or grandparent? What nonsense! Mothers work for the same reason that fathers do: to earn a living to support their families. Reading of studies that sound Chicken Little alarms about the effects of day care only creates an additional burden on those of us who are trying to do the best we can for our families. LORAINE JONG Orinda, Calif.

When is someone going to say what the real solution is to the problems kids are having today? Stay home, parents, and rear your children! If that doesn't fit into your plan, then do everyone a favor, and don't have any. SANDY DAIGER Topeka, Kans.

A few kids on the receiving end of the push to create little Einsteins let us know how they were holding up (or not). "Most kids are not born geniuses; we have to strain our brains until they bleed," wrote a 12-year-old from Massachusetts, adding, "Parents are competing with other parents to see whose kid is better and smarter." Declared a California teen: "I usually don't finish my homework until 11 p.m. I'm so stressed. I get good grades, but I'm in fear that without more extracurricular activities, I may not get into the college I want." And we got this poignant e-mail from a 14-year-old Ontario girl: "School is great, and so is studying, but sometimes when I'm working inside on a beautiful day I almost start to cry. I hope I don't wake up some day to find I spent my entire childhood behind a textbook."

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