For the Love of Arnold

Sunday, Aug. 10, 2003 By MATTHEW COOPER/WASHINGTON

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Five years ago, when she gave the commencement speech at the College of the Holy Cross in Worcester, Mass., Maria Shriver relied on the usual bromides. "Gotta have laughter." "Pinpoint your passion." "Be willing to fail." But then she turned to the subject of sex, and brought the Catholic graduates to their feet. "Forgive me, Mommy," she said, and went on to argue that womankind's great contribution to civilization is "awesome creative sex". She later wrote a book outlining her philosophy of life, in which she felt compelled to reveal, "There's no Viagra within a 50-mile radius of our house."

Her mother, Eunice Shriver, may be the sister of the late President John F. Kennedy, but Maria Shriver isn't your typical Kennedy — and not just because she has managed to link sex with humor rather than scandal. What distinguishes the 47-year-old is her choice to become a journalist despite coming from a paparazzi-plagued clan in which a certain kind of prying is regarded with disdain. Her father, Sargent Shriver, led the Peace Corps and was George McGovern's running mate in 1972, and it was during that campaign that Shriver decided to become a reporter. After graduating from Georgetown University, she worked her way up through television news to become the anchor of the CBS Morning News, before low ratings led to her being summarily fired. She then went to NBC where she is best known as a correspondent for Dateline, and even won a prestigious Peabody for a piece on welfare reform. Last week, Shriver took a leave for the duration of her husband's campaign for California governor. Friends say she hasn't decided what to do it Arnold Schwarzenegger wins.

With fame, looks and pedigree — not to mention a rich movie star husband — you'd figure Shriver would exude self-confidence. But in her 2000 book Ten Things I Wish I'd Known Before I Went Out Into the Real World, she confesses to a slew of common insecurities, from "struggling with my weight" through the fact that her "ego was decimated" after getting fired, and how some of the other moms at her children's school "put June Cleaver and Martha Stewart to shame, not to mention me." This is a kind of humility not generally associated with her family. She keeps a Stuart Smalley-style inspirational note under her mirror that says, "I am creative, I am powerful and I can handle it."

Shriver has written two best-selling children's books. The first, What's Heaven?, was about death, written in 1999 and published shortly before 9/11. The second, What's Wrong WIth Timmy?, dealt with mental retardation — a lifetime family interest because of her aunt's condition. She told Oprah Winfrey, an old pal from their days as rising TV personalities, that the book "is an attempt on my part to help all children understand each other."

Shriver and Schwarzenegger have four kids, and she can often be spotted tooling around the Pacific Palisades with them, driving them to playdates or riding bikes along the area's scenic bike paths. "She's struck the balance that works for her and works for us," says Neal Shapiro, the president of NBC News. But these days she's been involved in all aspects of his campaign, talking on conference calls about his announcement. The Los Angeles Times reported last July that she helped Schwarzenegger pick a new agent last year; talent firms wanting his business wound up meeting the actor — and Shriver — in their kitchen. One of her closest friends, CBS Producer Roberta Hollander, says that when Arnold finished his publicity tour for Terminator 3 last month, he became increasingly interested in running for governor. Far from urging him not to run, says Hollander, Shriver told him: "I think you ought to do it." Adds Hollander: "She saw that this was his next great passion." What about the political differences between the two? "There's a great deal my husband and I don't agree on," Shriver writes in Ten Things. But friends expect her nonetheless to campaign for him publicly as well as play a major-behind-the-scenes role. As for the differences, Maria writes, "(Arnold) couldn't have been more different from what I imagined for myself but I went with the love."