Hollywood Plays Rough With Diamonds
DiCaprio's new film has the diamond industry doing damage control

The Dark Core of a Diamond
A broken engagement sends one man on a revealing trek through the gem trade in this exclusive book excerpt

Why De Beers Wants You 'Blood Diamond'-Savvy
The gem giant, facing twin threats of dwindling market share and a boycott fueled by human rights concerns, takes a new tack

Looking for Mr. Right


Maliki's Last Stand?
The prime minister makes a new call to curb violence, but Iraqis' patience with him and his government is wearing thin

What a Surge Really Means
Can a couple more divisions in Iraq make a difference? Or is Bush's idea too little, too late?

Where Does Negroponte Leave Intelligence?


Dec. 8, 2006
The Blood Diamond Debate
The movie Blood Diamond raises many questions about diamond rings. But should women want one in the first place? TIME held a debate on why women desired a diamond ring in the first place. We asked for your thoughts and here's what you had to say:


I have enjoyed my diamond engagement ring for 50 years and take pride in wearing it as a symbol of the love my husband felt for me when he made that investment. It is regrettable that diamonds have been used to support war lords but so has oil and we haven't decided to stop using it!
Catherine B. Wagner
Bonita Springs, FL

Whether or not to own a diamond or accept one for an engagement is a very personal decision and each person has their own reasons. What really upsets me, however, is the fact that a woman is expected to wear a ring that symbolizes she is "off the market." However, for men, there is no ring until they actually say the vows. I think it is grossly unfair that men are not expected to proclaim their engagement for all to see. It's as if women, upon receiving an engagement ring, are transformed into submissive doting partners while the man is not held up to those expectations for months or sometimes years later.
Angela Mrozinski
Grand Rapids, MI

My boyfriend got me a heart-shaped amethyst for my right hand. Not once has someone tried to tell me my boyfriend's commitment to me will not last as long as someone else's simply because the stone in my ring isn't a colorless one. And you can bet it sparkles just as well as any diamond does. If he'd gotten me a diamond, we wouldn't have a 50" Plasma HDTV in our living room right now!
Kim
Jacksonville, FL

Even if a diamond has been mined ethically, purchasing it will increase demand, which perpetuates the illicit trade. Americans dislike the OPEC cartel which controls oil prices, but unknowingly support the diamond cartel every time they buy a diamond. The prices of diamonds are artificially high due to held-back supply. Even with only a small fraction of diamonds released to the market, how can consumers still think diamonds are rare, given that every jewelry store in America is chock full of them?
Judy A. Vosburgh
Atascadero, CA

The only way to end blood diamonds is for the African people themselves to be able to control their diamonds, their governments and all their valuable resources.
Sita
Philadelphia, PA

When my husband and I decided to get married, I told him not to buy me a diamond because we could use that money to put a down-payment on a house. We've been married 5 years and I don't regret that decision for a second. We both wear my parents' original wedding bands and I love them...very sentimental.
Paige
Charlotte, NC

I happen to have a couple thousand dollars worth of ring on my finger. This, however, was not my idea. It was my fiancé's. It was when my mom showed him my great-grandmother's platinum-diamond-filigree engagement ring that he was hooked. After the proposal he described (with tears in his eyes) his frantic search for the perfect ring and how he just knew as soon as he saw it that, no matter what the cost, it had to be mine.

For us, it's perfect. And it's something we can hand down to our children. For other couples, maybe not. And don't think he doesn't get anything in return, either. I cook the man dinner every night!!
Amanda Marcotte
Alma, MI

It's OK for a woman to want a diamond, but it's the sense of entitlement that I perceive from many women that I find troubling. I want a place on the beach in Hawaii but I'm not so self-centered as to expect my partner to produce one for me or the deal is off! Also, the one-sided aspect of engagement rings makes absolutely no sense to me. People need to stop being led around by the nose by suggestive advertising of any type.
Kevin McDaniels
Santa Barbara, CA

In today's economy, with people being in debt up the wazoo, I can think of more practical ways for a young couple just starting out to utilize the money that would ordinarily be spent on a diamond. Like a down payment on a house perhaps? Or the expense of starting a family. As for the myth that the size of the diamond and the amount of money a man spends on it is somehow linked to how much affection he has for his betrothed, just go to a battered women's shelter and ask some of the domestic violence victims how big their diamond rings were. The tradition of ring giving has been totally been blown out of proportion.
Bob Schroeder
Trenton, NJ

I have told my daughters and nieces to make their own money, so that they can buy their own jewelry. This way they can marry for love and not money.
Mary Ford
Mill Creek, WA

Personally, I plan to buy two huge diamond crescent accent stones for a birthstone ring that I've been meaning to have restyled for years. I love the sparkle of diamonds, they take my breath away. It does concern me that some diamonds are on the market through the death and suffering of others. For that reason, I'll be mindful to inquire about the Kimberly Process when I purchase mine.

Would I want the love of my life to give me at least 2 carats? Absolutely. But at 44 years old and never married, if I sat around waiting for prince charming to get that diamond for me, I'd be forever deprived.
M.R.B.
Atlanta, GA

Men know the game. If you want a relationship with a woman you have to transfer wealth to her. Whether it's paying for dinner, buying a diamond, taking the vacation, whatever. It's so damn silly that someone else must supply a woman's sense of self-worth. If you want a diamond, dear girl, fill your head with thoughts of how to earn the money, not how to attract someone who will buy it for you.
Stan Pickens
Lake Mary, FL

I have never wanted a diamond ring. I am very practical and it does not suit my lifestyle. Before I got married I told my then fiancé that I would prefer a really nice juicer -- the type that grinds up carrots. I figured the carrots were healthier for me in a glass than carets encased in glass. Thirteen years later, I am still happy with my choice, and getting plenty of vitamin A.
Susan Schiro
Rockland, ME

Diamonds and huge, expensive weddings. When will the young girls of this country realize that marriage is not about how big, ostentatious and expensive the entrapments are? The wedding industry is making millions of dollars by duping young girls into thinking the wedding itself is the most important part of the marriage. Wake up girls, it is not about the diamond or the dress, it's about love and commitment.
Linda Huetson
LaGrange, IL

The diamond engagement ring is symbolic of the sacrifice the future husband will be making for the future bride in their life together. I'm quite old-fashioned, I know, but my personal view is that the marriage relationship reflects Jesus Christ's relationship to His bride, the Church, and the ultimate sacrifice of His death to save His bride. In the marriage relationship, the husband steps into similar shoes for his bride, and lives sacrificially for her. Sacrificing funds for an adornment for her is one way to depict that future life together. Perhaps superficial, but a nice tradition as well.
Brad
Ruston, LA

The demand for diamonds is driven by one of the most successful, and longest-running marketing campaigns ever. Diamonds are not really "worth" full retail price, at least not in the usual market-driven sense. Buy a used diamond and save money.
Mark Hudson
Los Angeles

I was educated on the topic when I was about 23 by a woman who could've afforded to wear whatever she wanted, but chose not to. After she explained to me her reasons -- who was profiting in the industry and who was not, and where to money was going -- I could no longer wear diamonds. I no longer see diamonds as desirable, and look upon people who wear them the same way I do people who wear fur. It never ceases to amaze me how people feign compassion while continuing to covet those large sparkly gems, yet go out of their way to let everyone know that the fur trim on their sweater is "only faux". The inhumanity of animal treatment is somehow greater than that of humans? If even a fraction of a percent of the money makes into the hands of warlords, who exchange it for instruments of homicide, isn't it worth it to make sure that we are not personally contributing?
Mary Martinez
Minneapolis, MN

I would never buy a diamond and have never wanted one. The first reason being that they have caused so much grief and misery in the countries where they are mined. Second because every one has one. They are not special, they are common and I am not a common woman. I do not need an overly expensive rock to make me feel special, loved or beautiful.
Tara Beal
Homer, OH

BACK TO TOP


Dec. 25, 2006

Dec. 18, 2006

Dec. 11, 2006

Dec. 4, 2006
Start Saving Now! Click here to get unlimited access to the TIME archive.


ADVERTISEMENT

Copyright © 2005 Time Inc. All rights reserved.
Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.

Subscribe | Customer Service | Help | Site Map | Search | Contact Us
Privacy Policy | Terms of Use | Reprints & Permissions | Press Releases | Media Kit